Growing up in the suburbs and going to a Catholic school in the ‘80s, I didn’t know a single person who was openly gay. And anything I heard about gay people was extraordinarily negative. I never really acknowledged any of my girl crushes. And since I had crushes on boys too, it never occurred to me that I could be anything other than straight.
I came out in stages, starting at age 30. The weight of my parents’ expectations still weighed heavy even as an adult. When I met my wife, I kept our relationship secret from my parents for a year. Coming out was one of the hardest things I have ever done, but also one of the things of which I am most proud. Since coming out, I finally feel comfortable in my own skin.