Episode 1: My Mission

Ella Bates 

Welcome to Episode One of Leadership Vibes, a Centennial podcast that's all about student leadership. This first episode in the season is all about our mission as leaders, and our guest today will share what matters to them, and why, what drives them and what gives purpose to what they have undertaken as leaders themselves. It's my absolute pleasure to introduce to you our two guests today. First of all, we have Basirat Naphew, who is in a second year student in our Social Service Worker program. She's an active member of the Experience Centennial student leadership team, a very passionate volunteer with Insight Heart Foundation, and the Scarborough Center for Healthy Communities, a budding entrepreneur and a devoted parent of two. And we have our second guest, Frincess Arbour, who is a recent graduate of the Child and Youth Care program and a current board member, as director at large for the Centennial College Alumni Association. She is very passionate about advocating for the rights of children, youth and families in her community. She's continuing her education at Ryerson University and is a mom of two so busy, busy people. On our show today. Welcome, Frincess and Basirat. It's my absolute pleasure to have you on today. Welcome.

Frincess Arbour

Thank you so much for having me.

Basirat Naphew  

Thank you for having me, Ella. It is a pleasure to be here today.

Ella Bates  

We're so happy to have you. And I'm so excited to hear what you have to say about leadership. So let's get right into the questions. So I'm going to start off with the biggest question here. In your own words, how do you define leadership? What is it? What does it mean, for this question, first of all, to Frincess

Frincess Arbour  

So I think leadership is more than just leading a whole bunch of people into whatever it is that needs to get completed. I think leadership is being able to be present with the people that you're with, and just being able to communicate in a way where you're present with them. And that everyone is aware that we're all kind of on the same team. And we all have a goal in mind and can figure out how to achieve that goal together.

Ella Bates  

I love that. I just want to ask you a quick question, you brought up a really important word there, Frincess, about being present, what is being present really mean?

Frincess Arbour  

Just being able to understand and like speaking to people on a, instead of a command level, kind of figuring out where they're at, as well in life, I think a good leader would be able to take in everything that, all the information that we know, and then being able to kind of place somebody in a position where it would be relevant for them. Right? Like, we're not going to ask somebody to do something when you know, their situation right now is like hectic. So just being mindful of, of everyone's situations, and then accommodating everyone.

Ella Bates  

I love that, really setting people up for success. If we were to summarize that, yeah, love it. Thanks, Frincess. That's right. Basirat, what's your take? Is it similar? It's a different, we're looking at it a different lenses. Where are you at with leadership?

Basirat Naphew  

Very similar. So what Frincess just shared about vision, and you what your mission is, what the purpose is, I think leading a group of people is not just about driving them to achieve your individual mission or your own personal goals. It's more about accomplishing a group purpose. And if everybody's committed that purpose is common to everyone they know this is what we need to achieve your job as a leader becomes a lot simpler, because then you just need to motivate them to inspire them, we know where we're going. So your job is easier, just motivating, giving them the needed resources to help everyone achieve that goal. So that's how I see leadership. I know it's not personal. It's not just my personal goal, it's not just my dream, we're given this, this is a dream goal that I want to achieve. This is a dream purpose we're all working towards. So the job as a leader becomes a lot easier when we are also empowering everyone. That's making sure everybody feels committed, everybody feels they own this, you know, their contribution is valid, whatever they're bringing to the table is respected, it's valid. So they feel committed to that goal and want to get to work activating the goal together.

Ella Bates  

I love that I love that heart. And you both really honed in on some very important points of it being a shared vision. It's not, "this is my vision as a leader." This is collectively together as a group, as a community, as an organization and a friendship circle as well. Right? What is our shared vision? Now that's very, that's a very formal side of leadership. We've been given this leadership role. We are formally recognized as a leader and we just switch it on its head here. As an informal leader. There may or may not be a group, there may be one person in front of us. They may be online, it might be a digital footprint as a leader, how does that change when you are an informal leader? One where you haven't been formally given the title of manager, supervisor, leader, coach, etc. How is that different? Or how is it the same? Basirat, do you want to talk about that first?

Basirat Naphew  

Absolutely. And I just couple of ideas and couple of live examples just flashed through my mind, as you mentioned that, an unlimited one has just been working with, on teamwork, even on team assignments in college. It's a typical one where you're not assigned as a leader. But then there are instances where you have to step in, take on that leadership rein, and just guide things to achieve the common goal. Again, it comes to that purpose. That purpose has been defined right at the start, we know this group assignment needs to be done, we have a deadline. All of that is clear. But then nobody's taking that leadership role to guide us. What needs to be done, who is doing what? So in that aspect, second up, leadership is an informal way. And in many instances, I had to step in to direct where things are going, like just I'm saying, okay, everybody's deadline is tight. When are you available to me? You know, I'm not officially stepping up to say, okay, I'm going to take up this leadership, I'm jacking this leadership role, I'm the leader of this team, but just stepping in to help guide the direction of where things are going. When can we meet? And everybody says their time, find a mutually agreeable time. Okay, who wants to do this? Who's gonna write up the couple of people, who is going to do this? So that way, it's an informal way of leading. But regardless, you're exhibiting leadership skills. And at the end, the group goal is still achieved.

Ella Bates  

I love that you used the word guidance, Basirat, I think you're so right there. We all look for guidance, we all look for a leader. And while someone isn't walking around with the formal title, you're right, we have to sometimes step in, or at least volunteer someone else. Hey, can you lead us on there? Can you be a part of this? It's like taking on the role as a big sister. No one's given you a badge saying you are a formal big sister, her big sister, you take on that role, you know that you can guide your younger sisters or brothers, right? That's really, really interesting, that. How about you, Frincess? from a guidance perspective, let's really carry on the conversation there from Basirat. How are we informally guiding others? Maybe you can share an experience where recently you have informally been a guidance to someone else, maybe outside of the college experience?

Frincess Arbour  

Yeah, absolutely. I think I'm taking initiative to see if there's anything that needs to get done. And I think leadership is that as well, even if it's behind the scenes. And so I was approached recently by a friend, and she had this amazing idea. And I just, instead of like, you know, we're part of this club as well. And I said that could be something that we could do for the club. But also I was able to give her some choices, like, you know, you could just take this on, and, and lead this thing yourself. And there are benefits to that as well. And so I just kind of gave her some instructions on, not instructions, but advice, I guess, things that I would have probably done, because I know that she had some goals, like scholarship goals and things like that, I'm like, you can use this for your scholarship writing. And so it was just a way of me kind of giving her a little bit of like advice and options of what she can do with this big idea. And so I think that'll, yeah,

Ella Bates

I love that. And I love the fact that you've talked about taking an initiative. Where is an opportunity for me to help guide someone to success, and how we can do that as close as a friendship mentioning an idea? Hey, let me take on this leadership role. Let me help guide you in this with my knowledge, with what I know of the world, with resources I know of, with tools I know of. Oh, I love that! It's almost like we have a leadership radar. What a great concept. Let me ask you guys listening right now, do you have a leadership radar? When was the last time we looked for an opportunity to help lead, to help make a change to help guide other people to success? That's a beautiful thought. Thanks for bringing that to us today, Frincess. Basirat, what experiences have you had outside of academia, maybe in your community, your family, your friendship groups where you've used that leadership radar, of which we should copyright that absolute phrase, I love that, leadership radar? When have you lost use of your leadership radar? I'd love to hear that.

Basirat Naphew  

Yeah, I'm gonna start borrowing that phrase, leadership radar. Okay. But one example that I love to always go back to, and it's just something I'm so proud of, it's an example at work, that was at my former workplace, it's a financial setting, and then a new employee came on board to my team. She's an immigrant like myself, but when she joined the team, she had a lot of challenges with communicating, writing in English and all of that. And she was so shy. But looking at that, and just being empathetic towards a situation, yes, I came to this country, and when that, I could speak English, but I could empathize with her. So I took her under my wing and just informally show that we're like, you know what, I've been in your shoes. I know what it is like, but you can do this. Just watch how I do it. If you have any questions ask me, and just guiding her, day after day, and over time, she really blossomed. She will write emails, and I'll be like, this looks like something I wrote, did I write this? This, you know, and then that's success of that story, just seeing how she blows them inside. So you know, get comfortable. So making conversations with people was part of the motivation that actually spurred me to start a Toastmaster at my workplace then. So I was one of the study members of the Toastmaster club at the workplace then, and helping a lot more people to actually improve communication skills.

Ella Bates  

Wow. So not only did you see an opportunity, then you empathize, use compassion. And then from that you actually created a whole campaign to drive more and more people's success. Do you see how leadership can be such a beautiful domino? From "hey, how you doing? How can I help you," to "now we have a Toastmasters Club" within work? That's right. That's a beautiful story. Now, I want you to both think about this. As you're talking, it's, it's what I'm hearing, in my mind is when we give these great guidance, advice and support and all the other wonderful things that leadership brings, which we'll talk about in just a moment, it's often the case, it's because we've had that observation from someone else who gave us that support. Right? So I'd love to hear what is it you've admired about past leaders you've had, whether that's a professor, or a friend, or a stranger in the grocery store, or someone on social media, or a book you've read? What was it about that particular leader that helps you derive what makes a great leader? Now,that's a big question. So I'll give you a second to think about that. Think about that, and I invite your listeners to think about the same, who is a great leader to you? And what is it about them when they lead you the measure believe that? That's what makes that amazing leader from a good leader to really someone who's very, very impactful. For instance, are you able to answer that? That's quite a heavy question, isn't it?

Frincess Arbour  

Yes, actually, there's a, there's so many influences around me, and then also just taking initiative on my own. And I actually, I'm, I'm dyslexic, so I don't really like reading books. But because I was in, put into a position of leadership. I wanted to be a good leader. And so yes, I took, I took courses and I took the leadership passport, and I, I read books that I thought would help me lead. And there was one book called How to Win Friends and Influence People. And I read that book. And I was like, you know, what, just his whole approach to people is something from an empathetic point of view, instead of like, demanding, it's just it's so non-assertive for me. And I just, that's, that's a, that's my leadership style is like, just more empathetic, and just being able to kind of level with people, and then being able to kind of get that influence. And I think it's important, but it's, it's something that really changed how I, I viewed myself as a leader and how I started to lead.

Ella Bates  

Isn't that impactful? Thank you for sharing that, Frincess. And that's quite for you to recognize that we don't have to be directly in front of someone to lead them. So for the listeners, and for anyone else that haven't read this book, it's a great book. It's been around for many, many years, it's bu Dale Carnegie, and How to Win Friends and Influence People, available at your local library right now. You can also listen to an audio book as well if you like to listen rather than read a formal book. You are right, we can influence from a space of writing. Even when we're writing assignments, you're influencing your professors. When you are writing something on social media, you are influencing, and you're gaining people with out even knowing it, because people often don't tell us how impactful we are, which, I invite everyone listening right now: Consider if someone's been really impactful for you, tell them. But I love that I love that you share, Frincess, that that has really guided your leadership style, and showing what really matters to you as a leader which is for you, leading from the heart, which is a beautiful place to be in, and it doesn't have to be the shaking of the finger and telling people what to do, which is what you say right at the start the podcast, that really showcases how strong and grounded you are in those values. That's really beautiful, Frincess. Basirat, onto you. Who was a great leader for you, and what characteristics that they showcase to you about how valuable you can be as a leader.

Basirat Naphew 

Like Frincess, I've had many, many, many influences over the course of my lifetime, I believe, in my personal circle, I've had great family members that that I, I've started to see them as cheerleaders because at some point, I will think, you know, what, whatever it is I deal with, it's that there's people I have at my positive corner. And if there is a time that I get in trouble, they are the first people I would go to. So knowing that you have the support system is one great thing, I have family members, but then also the family members, even in the workplace. I've had great bosses that just did, I think about them as not just giving you fish, but taking, teaching you how to fish. So my bosses, I've been fortunate to have bosses that would actually not just assign sites and let you swim or sink, they walk me through the process, they offer guidance, and they see, they see a bigger vision even for me, like even things I don't see myself, they don't like give me projects and kind of trusted to me, they were like, You know what, I believe you can do this, go get started, when you need help, let me know. And they offer the guidance, they offer their time, even when they're busy, always willing to help guide me to make sure I get it done the right way. And in so many settings, I've been fortunate to come across leaders of that caliber, that willing to give up their time, and that really inspires me. So when I feel like I'm tired, or I have a full plate, I can't find time to help or chipping into something that comes to my mind. But like, you know what, this person was able to help me regardless of the many things they have going on, and when I look at what they have achieved compared to what I have, and I think I am busy, that really get me off my path and be like, you know what, I can do this. So I find that very inspiring, and try to give and help others as much as I can, when I can do that.

Ella Bates  

I love that, again, that leadership radar. How can I be someone's cheerleader? And I love, and whoever that is in your family, please, go and tell them how great of a cheerleader they are for you. Because we don't tell, do you? I'm asking you leaders right now, I'm sure people who are listening and nodding their head, we don't tell people often enough just how impactful they are to us. And right now, you listening right, now, Basirat, Frincess, on the call, here with us, you're impactful in ways that you have no idea, because people aren't telling you. So if we all go and start going and sharing with people, just how impactful they are, we can do more of it. And when we know we're doing great, we could do more of it. But let's get back to this cheerleader factor. You're right, leadership is about being someone's cheerleader in all aspects. When they fall, when they rise, we congratulate together and we celebrate together, we also commiserate and look for solutions together as a leader, like, that's just beautiful. Look at all these great phrases we're getting out of today's podcast, the cheerleader leader, the leadership radar, like this is really cool. And using that radar to say who can I be a cheerleader to today, who needs me on the sidelines with a big pom poms, cheering them on, and whatever is driving them, their goals and where they want to be successful. Wow, huge. Oh my goodness, I love this. You guys are great, contributing so much. We appreciate you here on the podcast today. What I'd like to do is ask you now, what do you think you have as a leader that's unique to you? Because all of us have what sets us apart from other leaders in the world. I will be different to you Basirat, you'd be different to Frincess, and so on. And the same for you as leaders, something sets you apart from other leaders. What do you think that is for you? Let's go with you, Frincess.

Frincess Arbour  

I think my ability to kind of feel people out and just be really observant with how, like, moods are. And I think that's so important when it comes to any kind of meeting. Or just yeah, when you're meeting and you're planning something, I think being able to feel people out and how they're feeling. I think that's like my superpower. Yeah, emotional intelligence. And just, yeah, being able to kind of apply that into my leadership role is, I feel like, gives me an advantage.

Ella Bates  

An advantage or a superpower, whatever you want to call it.

Frincess Arbour  

Yeah!

Ella Bates  

We should ask ourselves the question, what is our superpower in leadership, and to have that emotional intelligence, which we know to be such a deep, staggeringly critical skill, to be able to really understand people knowing that, from a human being perspective, we want to be seen, heard and understood as our main critical things in life to feel successful and fulfilled, and at heart with ourselves and our souls, that's a beautiful skill to have that superpower in. So keep doing that, Frincess, we love that side of you as, as a superhero. Now, Basirat, I have to ask you and all listeners, I invite you to consider, too, what makes you the superhero in leadership, what is your superpower?

Basirat Naphew  

Mine would have to be motivating and inspiring others, it's, it just gives me joy. I just radiate joy doing that, when I'm in a space where I get to motivate and inspire people. It's something that really drives me. And I find over time I've had people tell me that they just find it easy to talk to me. And in that talking, I guess I'm able to empathize with them, and not only empathize, I'm in that conversation, I could tell what they're capable of doing. And I just tap in to be like, you know what, I know what you can do. And I know we push yourself, you try harder, you can even achieve more. So I just naturally step into that role to try to motivate and inspire people to take on bigger roles, to take on leadership roles, to take on greater goals for themselves, you know, and really blossom and try to push them to achieve greater heights. And it's one thing I really love doing in my Toastmaster club. I'm the president now of Speak Up Centennial,  I've been able to motivate a lot of our members to step out of their comfort zone and try different roles for the first time. Just being the greatest cheerleader, knowing they have that support. It's always, it's always very, very nice to see them willing to consider new things and try it out for themselves.

Ella Bates 

I love that. And that's where the magic really happens, isn't it? Outside of our comfort zone is a magical, yet very scary place. But that's where the magic happens. And to have leaders like you, Basirat, really driving people to and holding their hand as they step out of that comfort zone, too, that magical place is, really quite beautiful. Wow. Superheroes skills, indeed. I invite you guys listening right now, what is your superpower as a leader? And are you able to articulate that? What a great, what a great way of leading, wow. Well, I'm going to ask you the very final question here. And likely one of the biggest ones, I want you to share just one tip each that you feel that's going to help shape our listeners right now on their leadership mission. If they want to become the leader that they deserve and desire to be, what tips do you have for them. Frincess, maybe start us off here.

Frincess Arbour  

I think I think knowledge is something that, and experience would be something that is essential and key. And so just take on any role. Even if it's as small as a group assignment, I think it's just being able to kind of practice leadership, and being mindful that you are trying to do leadership, you know, and then learn and take advantage of all of the resources that you have available to you, you know, conferences, courses that you can take, I think that that'll help elevate and give you a little more confidence in, in your journey as a leader.

Ella Bates 

I love that you're right. That's two very powerful parts of leadership, that continuous improvement. It's not just, okay, I've read a book, I know what to do. Keep going, elevate, I love that word, Frincess. Thank you for sharing, keep going, keep learning, keep growing. Yeah, beautiful. Basirat, how about you? What's your biggest tip for our listeners out there?

Basirat Naphew  

For me, I think the biggest tip will be first understanding where you're going. You also know where you have been, I think it's always good to know, okay, you probably have past experiences where you're going right now. And after that reflection, you can articulate, define your purpose. So that is a major driver, knowing your purpose, your goal, and it has to be unique to you. You're not just saying, oh, Janet is doing this, I'm going to hop onto that boat, you know, that's gonna get, you're gonna get tired of that very soon. But if it's something that is unique, is authentic, it's what you really want to do, it becomes a lot more easier. And then after that, you find your purpose, you find the direction, which is the plan, how do I now achieve this goal? So it becomes a lot easier. This is your proposal unique to you, you have announced the direction, how you intend to achieve that goal, becomes a lot simpler. And if you need help, by all means, you go back to the drawing board, you go back to, you know, there's a lot of resources, and for students of Centennial, I always say there is a pot of gold within Centennial, the opportunities, the Leadership Passports. There's so many opportunities and resources to help you develop your leadership mission, your leadership goals. And even just hone your leadership style as much as you want, and finally, define the success criteria for yourself, what does success look like for you? So, you know, once I actually have X, Y and Z, I am happy that is successful you're now successful, Basirat, are successful, Frincess. So we're defining success for you, and define what makes you happy. Those three things I think are key to you, shaping your personal leadership mission.

Ella Bates  

Wow, beautiful words. You heard it here first: Be yourself. Stand in your authenticity. Yes. So Right. You know, as Dr. Seuss says in his books, there's no one more you-er than you, and we're all so very unique. And with our superpowers, using our leadership radars, being cheerleaders, we're a podcast. Basirat, Frincess, thank you so very much for being on today's podcast. It's been our absolute pleasure. Thank you for sharing your journeys, your joy and your experiences. And now all these beautiful phrases that we have to take and these questions and reflections we can now make for our listeners, and those here on the call too. And I also want to thank you, listeners for joining us today on episode one of Leadership Vibes. In our next episode, we'll discuss our impact as leaders, how we've made a difference in the lives of others, and our own lives, so make sure to subscribe to the Centennial College Podcast on SoundCloud, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and Spotify. Until next time, bye for now.